Last week, Dr Suzanne Zeedyk gave a wonderful training day on attachment theory, building strong connections with young people at TIGERS LTD. TIGERS LTD is an organisation that cares about its development and young people which in my opinion not all organisations truly do.
I feel not all organisations value young people, see their potential and can be quite short sighted. But, I feel this is more to do with a lack of understanding about attachment and understanding behaviour. Suzanne Zeedyk opened our eyes and shocked us to the harsh reality that some people face. But most importantly she taught us it’s okay not to be perfect, we all make mistakes. It’s okay to feel. We aren’t robots. We all react to things differently. We cope with situations differently. It’s not the case of “fixing someone”. But simply, how can we help?
Unfortuately, we aren’t all dealt the same hand. Not all of us have supportive parents. A father that gives us a warm hug and tells us everything will be okay. Or a mother that gives us a loving smile and loving advice. If you don’t have these things, how can you cope?
I don’t know what I would have done without my loving family. I was once labelled as a stupid girl who couldn’t retain information. While trying to cope with my gran passing away. It was support that got me through. It was support that put a smile on my face.
If you are reading this and have in the past been dragged down, felt like the world is against you and alone, but managed to turn your life around – I commend you.
If you are reading this and feel like there is no hope and you’re just a screw up. You’re not. You matter. Always believe. You can turn your life around. Don’t let your stresses and anxieties get to you.
Its important to tackle your stresses and anxieties. That’s right! Tackle that Sabre Tooth Tiger and have a calm internal Teddy Bear. We all have some level of anxiety and as we get older we are suppose to develop coping mechanisms, resilience and be able to problem solve. So you don’t look like a blubbery crumbly mess. But is it that simple? That’s the beauty of human beings, hell no.
For some people, it’s about having a helping hand. It’s about having someone to listen. It’s about having a non-judgemental conversations. Y’know those conservations where you can actually taste the judgement you are a screw up. This is a HUGE barrier. It’s about showing compassion. Campassion is not a weakness, it’s a strength. It’s about trying to show interest in a person, trying to understand their world with an open mind. Trying to build a relationship.
How can we move forward?
This is one of my favourite questions. Why? Because there is always a way forward. Trying to change your mindset. A mindset that understands that this is the start of this young person journey.
Simply, have a heart.
Can you relate? Or am I just going crazy?